Monday, February 4, 2019

Gold Star for The Everyday Stuff

Today I did something I have not done in seven years.

I haven't done it for various reasons.
Doing it brought me such simple joy. I took my time. Enjoyed every moment and welcomed in the freedom and new feelings.
It made me appreciate how doing this "living life business" is extremely complicated, and how we deserve gold stars for the every day stuff.
Yes, it is amazing when we achieve the big things. I love that. It is the small daily things that need to be celebrated too. I see those as the smaller, important steps to taking the bigger leaps. The things that build our enthusiasm and confidence. Our power.
As January 1st is way behind and it seems all my thoughts on walking, writing and eating salad are hidden in the depths of my mind, I have been judging myself and not being my best friend, and I find it harder to then continue.
For example - 'writing' and I have broken up. We are on a break. Apparently it's me, not 'writing'. They are clearly seeing other people. I'm doing all the write  right things, pretending it doesn't matter, I look fantastic when I use my laptop and I have stopped re reading and re reading my rejection letters.
Perhaps though, I have given too much credit to 'writing' to prove that I am successful, when today was a very big achievement for me. It was a public and private indication that I am a beautiful, brave heart, willing and wanting to share. Wanting to love and showing up for everything that it means. AND I tell you people, sometimes, it's not easy. We can hold onto the past wishing for things to be different, or back there again, when we need to let go and look toward the very moment that is surrounding us. The only way I feel we can get to that point is by facing everything with only one person in mind: yourself. Heal yourself - not the past situation. Heal yourself first and be gentle every step of the way. That's what I did in order to arrive at this new wonderful stage of my life and I am being rewarded for that.
I am able to love again because I started with me. Time and luck has nothing to do with it. AND because I am loving me, I keep checking in with myself as guidance to create a life that pleases us both.

Today I am so happy that I was reminded of these small achievements, that were not even feasible for me a few years ago. It's a bit like when we were awarded gold stars for school tasks, they all mount up and make you feel deserving of being able to achieve more.
Sometimes it's good to award yourself a gold star for just showing up for the day, because there are days when just showing up takes everything you can muster. It's not a competition, it's your life.
Stop thinking of the everything and look at the one thing.

So, what can you celebrate that you did today?

PS: The thing I did today - was to buy a valentines card.

PPS: The card is not for 'writing.' (Though if they get jealous, that's great!)

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