After a work trip away this week, I had a long journey back home which included a matrix of logistics that had my brain needing to think step by step, and, I will admit, my soul was heavy and complicated with new emotions and feelings that deserved attention.
As I drive, I relax and go with the rise and fall of my feelings. I feel the strength and the tears, the empowerment and the loss and I attempt to pay no attention to any of them, I need to just let them flow in and flow out. Welcome them, see them, then let them go. Like water is in constant movement - I need to do the same. Trusting that what is true and healthy for me, will eventually settle.
The miles and hours pass, the various drop off and collection points happen. Stairs, boxes, petrol, airport, return rental car, call a Lyft driver, blah blah blah. I even notice the emptiness of the moving walkway at the airport and what it conjures for me inside. How my brain lingers on the loneliness and not the moving forward.
I'm finally at my last leg that will get me home and at that point - I am stopped in my tracks. My car has a flat battery and the occurrence of that had nothing to do with me. Not my fault. An unintentional mistake by somebody else. A flat battery. Just at the point where I said, look at all of that I did carefully and simply, now I get to rest and let go. A dead battery gives me another thing to solve.
I can hear Alanis Morissette singing "Isn't that ironic, don't you think.?"
I had lead a wonderful workshop earlier that day, to set off a year of coaching and leadership to a determined group of people. One of their major concerns is how to keep the momentum going, and as I suggested the only way to do that is to simply make all of this good, healthy thinking a habit. Things can happen with thought, but, action is also required. Yes its hard work, and the brain tells us how challenging it all is - when truthfully we just need to breathe and keep moving. When we have that privilege we need to use it.
So, here's my point. There will be times we feel we have stopped. There will be times that we must slow down, as indeed there are times for the opposite, to rush, giddily forward and leap. All of it is always, absolutely always moving. We can't be afraid of that, actually we could gain hope from that. The classic saying of this too shall pass. And so it always does.
I watch the river flowing
An ocean gushing, swaying, pounding
Or as silk and settled
Even then it stirs.
Is it doing it because of the pull of gravity?
Or through pure magic unseen, unknown?
Like water is in constant movement - we need to do the same.
Happy February everyone & much love.