Joining Twitter

Oh no I didn't! Well, I didn't mean to. It just happened. I am not guilty of going in with intention.
They convinced me, teased me and tempted me. It's obvious they all attended a Dale Carnegie Sales Course, because I joined.
Was it a business course? Do you know me?
Was it a gym? Are you delirious?
Was it a cooking class? Are you stupid?

I joined Twitter. As mentioned, I did not mean to.

My talented friend, Jen Smith, www.moresinglethannuns.com, is now twitting. Is it twit or tweet?
So I went on, to see what she was writing about. Oops, did I say writing? I mean twitting.
I find that to read, I have to follow her. This scares me, the term "following" her. I know what they mean. Couldn't they find another word though? "Following" immediately conjures dark alleys in my mind and I don't like it!

So then to read..I mean to follow. I have to join (log on for the younger readers) and become a twit myself.

Two hours later I have laughed at Steve Martin (genius) laughed that Dali Lama has a tweet as well as Jesus Christ ( a magical carpenter). I have seen more life coaches, swear words, actors and tattoos than the Immigration Office on a Monday morning.
I now feel totally useless that I'm not as funny, clever, traveled, inspiring and motivating as most of the tweets. I feel lonely and ugly that I have no wonderfully quirky yet gorgeous photo of myself to download. I also feel stupid that at first I thought Lady Gaga had tons of tweeter entries, until I worked out that the picture of THE EGG is for sad folks like me, without photos. 

Hence now I am a writer..no I mean a twitter, who reads..no I mean follows...and perhaps I will write...no I mean tweet. This proves that I could be:
old, boring, out of touch, lazy, not as original as I thought I could/would/should be and is factual evidence that I am severely behind the times.

Tomorrow I am going to study to become a psychologist who will specialize in supporting those who become depressed and bitter through social media.
www.depressedandbitterthroughsocialmedia.com
tweet - guntohead i
facebook - shyhidingnevercomingout