Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Wednesday's Wishes

Today my Stars said:

Get the rest that you need, Jayne. Your actions today should be slow and methodical. Don't try to experiment with something that you know nothing about.

So ironic on the very day that I was going to start heated speed yoga at 4am.

This is a joke of course, there is no such thing as heated speed yoga. Well now I have said it, there will be. Is it only me, who looks at that dieting advert that pops up as you write emails, of the woman on the scales with the large white knickers and thinks "Blimey, that's me! How did they get that photo?"

Again last night I cried while watching The Biggest Loser. Those folks are so brave and what a very unreal situation they are in. Can you believe that I was actually watching while eating my father in laws famous ribs dripping in barbecue sauce. (You do understand that he cooked them, I don't mean that I am now a werewolf and was eating his actual ribs.) Anyway, there I was eating and crying, expecting Bob and that scary lady Jillian to reach out of the TV to punch me.

I should/could/would be ashamed of myself. Today I caught a reflection and it looked like I had one of those Victorian bussell skirts on.

Trouble is, December is kind of at the end of the year and not worth starting anything new.

I love December. Absolutely love it. I would cover every room in tinsel if I could. We swing both ways in my house, with a tree and a menorah, so I feel especially fortunate.

A few years ago I had the perfect job, as a manager for a Santa's grotto in Watford shopping center. I was dressed as a toy soldier and delighted in every minute of it. Even the slightly odd times - such as when my Santa decided it would be a good idea to lift his beard and greet the kids with the name of Stan. And the time when the morning Santa went into a dark mood refusing to see anyone because the afternoon Santa had been delayed at his audition for The Bill.

A year later I was a manager for multiple sites. I would travel around the country with spare gifts, headache pills and extra Santa beards. During a Grotto opening in Manchester a pumpkin caught on fire at Cinderellas castle and I had to evacute 800 children, 400 angry adults and three Santas. It was hard work yet somehow I always ended my day with a smile.

I loved the children's faces, the magic, the music, our mechanical carol singers that smiled and nodded as you passed. I loved the babies in the prams. Especially the ones who were weighed down with so many gold necklaces, bracelets and earrings. They wore football shirts declaring their admiration for Gazza. Their skinny, young mums would beckon them to try and sit up. "Come on Shaynnnneee, smile for Santaahh" they would screech through their chewing gum.

I simply love this season and always feel a tingle of excitement when I see a Santa Claus.
Who knows, these days, it could all turn out to be true.

Favorite Food of the Day: Beef LoMein
Favorite Song of the Day: It's the most wonderful time of the year - written by Eddie Pola and George Wyle

Mondays Neat & Proud

Last Monday my Stars Said:

You are apt to take a look at your neat and orderly closet, your well-organized desk and your clean bathroom, and be proud, Jayne.

As the song goes, two out of three ain't bad!

1, My desk. I try to keep this well organized. It is reasonably small on purpose so that clutter does not find a place. I love being organized at work. Handy really, seeing as I am an event planner. I am addicted to ring binders, plastic folders and things with colored tabs.

Ziplock bags were invented just for me. I love them! In fact when I die I request that I be placed into a ziplock bag (triple gallon size with zipper) and thrown into Padanarum Harbor. After drifting for awhile I intend to become the new Loch Ness Monster, but along the coast of Hawaii, with heat and turtles and the like.

2, My bathroom. I love a nice bathroom. I am the type of girl who loves burning candles, bubbles up to my neck with a clay face mask plastered on. Once in Florida, I was in a room that featured a jacuzzi. It was awful. The thing was so loud and had this huge mirror in front of it.
Ruined my relaxation and the advertising image I have of myself. I shudder when I see hotels boasting that they have heart shaped jacuzzis. They are about as attractive as a bag of soggy pork rinds and a beer belly.

3, The wardrobe. At least twice a year I act upon the idea of clearing it out and getting it sorted. I buy padded hangers and those shelf things that promise to organize. I have even bought those plastic storage bags that you pack up and then let the vacuum hose pipe perform a sexual act with and bingo everything can fit into a small space. Not true, by the way, those things are great to watch, but are only that, pure entertainment.

Twice a year everything I own gets pulled out and put into enthusiastic piles. I then pretend that I'm hosting a TV show called "Getting Back in the Closet", in order to tease myself into tidying more. Soon the perfectionist system I have set up including colors, sizes, practicals, goes by the way side. As soon as you start a miscellaneous section, you know you are way past interest.
Finally I end up throwing everything back for another day and so it remains.
Well, that's why wardrobes have doors! They are way better kept in a mess, Narnia would not have been so magical in a tidy wardrobe.

Favorite Food of the Day: Mini Wheaties
Favorite Song of the Day: Brickhouse by The Commodores

For my Universe

I have had so many thoughts recently for blog posts that could be inspiring for those around me, and yet I can never quite find the words. M...