Thursday, August 27, 2009

Thursday's psychology

Today my stars say this:

Something you read today could have a dramatic impact on your life, Jayne. Pay particular attention to articles on dream psychology.

I finished the book I was reading today. It was wonderful. Alice Hoffman - The Story Sisters. Wow that lady can write. Did I ever say I wanted to be a writer? That's like going into a Chinese restaurant and asking for a cheeseburger.

I also read the menu at the drive through. A new donut with toffee chippings on it looks good!

Maybe I'm not reading the right things to discover something on dream psychology.

I had a pedicure about an hour ago. I am one of the very few who does not enjoy the procedure, even though the end result is great.

A pedicure looks too medical to me. Too many instruments with sharp edges close to the skin makes me look for an accident. And don't get me started with the dentist! Whoever thought of such torture. At least with a pedicure you end up with your toes sparkling red (or what color you want, pick a color!)

At the dentist you end with blood, spit that travels and a voice that sounds like you have stuffed ten waffles into your mouth.

My fear of the dentist has been present since I was a child. Once a dentist showed me what he was going to do to my brothers teeth. It was not a threat, his aim was to make me see how OK it really is - the result was me screaming, throwing up and fainting on the floor.

I also remember, too well, that scene from the movie The Marathon Man, with Dustin Hoffman and Lawrence Oliver. If you have not seen the movie and still like the dentist - never see that movie!!

I am in awe of the power of movies and words in books. My toes look good too!

Favorite Food of the Day: The new do nut with toffee chippings
Favorite Song of The Day: I Gotta Feeling - by Black Eyed Peas

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Wednesday slowly provides advice

Today my stars say:

In some way or another, you may be asked to slow down today, Jayne.

Now this is too good to ignore! All those childhood days where teachers screamed "Get a move on!" All those races where I stumbled in red faced and horribly last. Where were my stars then, with their glorious advice of slow down?

And listen to my stars as they provide a warning:

Whether this comes in the form of a speeding ticket, or a scrape on the knee when you trip because you were walking too fast, know that this message is one that must be listened to.

I never walk too fast. I did a charity walk in 2007 and Grandmothers with walking frames overtook me. In fact I'm still trying to finish my charity walk of 2007.

The key for you now is not to get too emotional as a result of this slow-down. Know that it is for your own good; so don't whine about it, just do it.

I whine about many things. Anything to do with diets, for example, deserves a good whine.

The fact that I have swollen ankles during the summertime no matter what size I am, obviously fits into the whine category. I still have the previously discussed mosquito bite on my foot, and it is making wearing shoes tough, this fits into the good old fashioned feel sorry for myself whine.
Indeed I am an alcoholic for the "why me whine". This said in a squealing voice with a sulky expression.

Whine about slowing down - oh no! Now that, I can savor and enjoy. This is entitlement to crash in front of the TV, remote in hand, pizza in other, feet up and remain in slouch position for several hours.

My favorite time to "slow down" is when the Lifetime channel are doing their countdown to Christmas and they show thirty I believe in Santa movies in one day.

(I am not a fan of the countdown to Halloween days. Anything with masks and piano music that is just one note, and I'm up turning on all the lights and loudly pretending that I'm having a party.)

Now that my day is over, I will slow down. This is good horoscopical (made that word up) advice, and one that many should adhere to. Life is afterall, an eventual habit. It deserves us to take notice of it and not to force it into over ride or press the automatic button too often.

Stop and smell the roses. Slow down and taste the do nuts!

Favorite food of the Day: Cheeselets
Favorite Song of the Day: When Doves Cry by Prince

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Sunday Roast

My stars on Sunday said:

You might be having trouble with your plumbing today, Jayne, particularly if you have a good-sized kitchen.

I just can't take the word plumbing seriously and I don't know why. It's like the word pudding! The reference to plumbing, kind of shocked me as I thought again that the stars were referring to my internal quirks, as previously discussed! I'm glad they added the part about the kitchen.

I like my kitchen. I do not know if it is a good sized one. My kitchen makes me want to do things like whisk, mix, broil and, well, open the stove door.

My Out Laws, are wonderful, well seasoned cooks. They have all the bowls and the knives and the focus to know when puffed is puffed and when a rib eye is not a tenderloin. They pull apart a lobster without flinching. Onions cry when my father in law greets them with his knife.

I once thought I might ask them to teach me a few recipes, but I don't know! Can you really teach a failed home economic girl stewing tricks? I grew up thinking that pineapple chunks came that way. I remember my brother confusing prunes with prawns. He was driven to tears seeing those black, shiny, bug like things staring at him when what he wanted was those pink things hanging from a glass of pink sauce stuff.

Not sure my desire for good old fish n chips would go down well in a kitchen known for Stuffed Rainbow Trout and Lamb braised in Red Wine.

My stars end with the greatest advice I have received all year:

In the meantime, have a pizza delivered while you're waiting to get your kitchen back!

Says it all!!

Favorite Food of the Day: Pepperoni Pizza
Favorite Song of the Day: Cat People by David Bowie