Monday, June 19, 2017

Art of Kite Flying

It's easy when it's easy.
The trick is not to give up. Last couple of days I felt the downward spiral beckon me to peer in.
I felt the pointless frustration of petty issues and, of course for the big issues.
Felt some disappointment. Felt that coldness when fear jeers at you rather than the warm sunshine of hope.
What on earth am I doing? What am I meant to be doing? What do I want to do?
All those questions without immediate answers.
I feel like someone cut the cord and I'm off spinning without control.

So, here is what I'm learning to do. Just stop. Don't fight it. Wait awhile.
I do everything I can to hold myself. Be safe. Read a book. Watch a movie. Breathe. Cry. Stop. Rinse and repeat. Be kind. Be gentle. Go easy. Become grounded.

Make a connection and slowly start again. Be patient with yourself. Be patient with life. Go back to gratitude and finding bright spots. Tell your mind, your heart, your soul, that it can press the snooze button. Just stop.
Accept that a significant part of our human experience is being human. Super heroes put their capes in the washing machine at least once a week - and so we can too.
This downtime is necessary to re fuel and energize. It's easy to get lost and it's actually just as easy to reconnect again. Stillness is key.

I think this kite looks just as pretty on the ground as it does in the air. And that's the wonder of it all. The wonder of us.



Wednesday, June 7, 2017

Brand New Summer Diet Fix

I have really exciting news that I am ready to share with you. You may want to sit down to read this, as you will be excited and want to jump on board with me.

Some of you have remarked that I look and appear slightly different these days.
Well, yes, it's true. And low I'm ready to reveal my secret:
I have gone salad free.

Yes, I am on a salad free diet. It's like gluten free, but the opposite.
I can not believe this easy fix in my eating has made such a difference in my life and in such a short period of a time.

I always fill full up. I am never hungry. I am sleeping better, sometimes I can even take a successful nap in the middle of the day.
My clothing is loser, because I wear a size too large for me.
I have more energy, immediately following a serious intake of sugar.
And on top of that, I do not need exercise. I never even think about it.

I begin the day with just a simple not green fruit smoothie, well it's a chocolate milk shake but I add fruit, and caramel, and pancakes, so I find it extremely filling. Then I have a regular breakfast, and all four meals, plus snacks throughout the day. The trick is consistency in the volume of food and to eat little portions of cake on an hourly basis.

I also find a neat little trick is to have cartons of chocolate cake frosting in the fridge, so you're never caught out.

Now of course, supermarkets make it difficult, as we all know the temptation they offer with their mountains of fresh fruit and vegetables when you first walk in. Just be disciplined, keep your head down and aim for the center aisles. Remember too that extra treats can be found and should be chosen as you are checking out, plus you can grab your copies of Trashy Home Maker magazine and Star Studs on the Beach, Summer word cross special.

I now enjoy four main ways of eating:

  • Focus on whole foods - this means eating whole bags of chips and packets of cookies in one session.
  • Consider calorie density - which means find extra calorie opportunities, like cocktails and wine.
  • Fill your plate with plants - which means also buy beautiful vases of flowers to enjoy while you eat.
  • Choose healthy fats - which means fry more.


AND, please know, I'm not perfect. Round about the fourth day, I promise you will have salad withdrawal symptoms. Headaches are common, as is the desire to wear green and eat strawberries without dipping them into melted chocolate. So, if you find yourself wanting to fall off the wagon, I recommend adding lashes of salad dressing to a bacon sandwich, just to get your fix, and then forgive yourself and move on.

It's so simple really.
So, join in if you fancy and we'll be ready to sit in our cars and watch people on the beach any day now.
Thank you.

Please note: no diet books were harmed in the writing of this article.


Sunday, April 30, 2017

Bourdain - Parts Unkown

This is why they say - do not watch television at bedtime.
Anthony Bourdain.
Him and food - wow!
I was well on the way to sleeps town, feeling relaxed and kind of tired after completing paperwork and a bit of a laptop struggle. The laptop issue could place me in grumpy old lady mode, so I thought switch it off, relax and watch tv in bed.

Watching tv while in bed has always felt like a real luxury to me.
I remember as a teenager being allowed to have this tiny black and white
contraption in my room. I think the screen was about ten inches wide, actually
I think the aerial was larger than the whole thing itself. It had huge round dials
and of course no remote (they hadn't been invented yet!) I loved it and felt
so grown up as I could watch tv while crimping my hair.

Anyway, here he is, in my room, wearing a white linen shirt, jeans and that divine salt and pepper
hair. Ohhh I swoon and think too loudly "I could show you parts unknown."
AND on top of that - there's the food. Rich, gorgeous, thick and interesting food.
My thoughts are far too ex rated for a Sunday.
I catch myself licking my lips.
My thighs quiver, my stomach rumbles.
Now I understand why I enjoy hotels - as they have a tv and a fridge in the same room.
That's perfection.

I'm now wide awake and on my way to the kitchen.

Tuesday, April 25, 2017

Random thoughts from airport terminal

The departure of my plane is delayed due to weather. The rain is beating drums against the terminal windows while customers complain of their time being wasted.
Modern technology allows for most people to set up temporary offices and continue business with a flair and great determination. Everyone looks busy, and I wonder, are they really that busy? Or with the possibility of an audience and silent yet noisy judgements, people create emails, documents and conference calls just to set the appearance of hard work.

One man is seated in such a position that his trousers make him appear to have an erection.
One man keeps repeating over the phone " just bcc them, bcc them."
One lady has that nervous leg tapping - I can't stand that!
Another just said on a call "no we don't roll out until May 1st".  What does everyone do? They are so grown up.
I think most people here look so cool, sophisticated, intelligent.
Not many here just ate McDonalds quickly followed by an entire bag of M&Ms that were meant for the two day trip.
How on earth do people wear sneakers and still look good?
How do people produce those laptops, wires and rockets of communication with headphones from such small bags?
How does that lady maintain that great lip gloss color? That scarf looks amazing on her and  she knows it. She wears both with attitude.

Why do the men coming from that flight look so better looking than those going on this flight?
I tell myself to read my book. To shut my jibber brain off. Next time bring my laptop, look at all the writing I could be doing. Then I might look like I fit in. I might look important.
A plane has just pulled up to this window and it has taken all my effort not to stand up and call "the plane, the plane!"
I wonder - is everyone else  sitting here thinking these random thoughts as they also pretend to fit in?

Thursday, March 30, 2017

Absolute Beginners

A friend of mine recently used the term "Fake it till you Make it."
No!!!
No need to fake.
It is OK that we are beginning. It is healthy that we are learning. The task of beginning something new is bold enough, adding a layer that is not genuine creates a distrust in yourself, that is not required.
Believe in what you want to do.
Soak in every resource available and dig up more.
Find people to support you, I call them your tribe.
Ask for support. Ask for help. Get your cheer leaders, get your theme song.

Some things we begin, we never expected to have to do, like illness, loss, sudden challenges, that dreadful phone call. We have to dive straight in, there is no time to sit and ponder.
Yet, when we choose to do something, boy can we stop the diving and walk up that ladder so gingerly that we are just hoping to hear someone shout "Get Off".

Find your motivation, that voice that will drown out the negative. That voice that will kiss a feeling of warmth in your knowing, inside your heart, where the inspiration shines from.

I have had many, many songs and continue to use them. The one that spoke to me when my David was first diagnosed with cancer and then Early On Set Alzheimers was Absolute Beginners by David Bowie.
OK, this is what we have, what on earth do we do with it? I had no idea, and we had no chance of being perfect at the beginning, but my goodness we did all we could to get it right, and that is all you can hope for.

AND please stop the personal judgement of "having to start again." I'm talking to myself here. In order to begin again is showing a clear indication that you are dancing the dance and have the energy to keep looking - and that's a strength. So embrace it.

Nobody starts at the top, absolutely nobody. We are all beginners and the joy is, that we get to start each day whenever our morning arrives. So no faking required, just believe and do absolutely everything you can. That is the difference.


Wednesday, March 1, 2017

Lent and Netflix

I know I am not the only one who gratefully welcomes that the term "to binge" is now connected to television. Not just food, alcohol and powdery things like donuts.
Since the days of black and white into Wizard of Oz color, humongous size tapes into thin discs that need no turning, into - joy of joys, miracle of walking on fiber optic cables - we bring you On Demand and Netflix.
Dear creator of Netflix, I love you. I stalk you, I adore you and I believe you turn water into wine, cookies into salad and sitting into jogging.

Today is the beginning of Lent, and traditionally one agrees to giving up on some gorgeous indulgence for forty nights. So, drum roll please, it will come as little surprise to pronounce myself to be giving up my current connection to my remote control and Netflix.

To be breaking bad of my transparent private practice of the affair I have. Make no bones about it, most of my friends, property brothers, girls and even a doctor who, does not realize how often i flip or flop my homeland way for twenty four hours through series upon Shonda series. If they gave awards I would win the crown and like a house of cards, the Americans would say it was shameless and a scandal for an idiot abroad to be having cupcake wars, when all she wanted was sex and the city with mad men, while wearing orange is the new black and dreaming of becoming the voice on Americas next top model.

So yes, it would make sense for me to give up on television, Netflix, on demand, anything that booms and begs to me from the electronic boxes in my home. I actually do hear voices that say why not watch season one just before season two begins, and that makes sense to me. I want to act upon that voice.

So here it is, the thing I give up on - My guilt. Give up on Netflix? Are you crazy?

Why shouldn't I be happy? I work hard in all manner of things. Keep turning pages to improve, to give, to learn, to be - and the one thing that continually trips me up, is my guilt.
And you know what? The constant, boring examination of myself not being good enough, is stopping me from doing anything. Is stopping me from doing everything.

A friend and I talked about changing the word guilty to giddy. I am giddy about something. I am feeling giddy about the chocolate I had. The phone call I didn't make. The money I just splurged.
I feel giddy - so with that exciting energy, what am I going to do next?

For forty nights I am going to let go of giddy, to see what change may occur.
I know we will lose weight, walk faster, speak Chinese and dance a tango if we give up sugar and replace it with something physical. What, however, could happen if we replace guilt with something fun, positive, whimsical and much, much lighter?
What happens if we look at giving, replacing, refilling, fulfilling, instead of taking away?
Let's look at happiness instead of denial or punishment.
Let's look at joy and fun instead of the duty of learning the lesson.

Season one is over.
What can season two tempt and tease us with?
Let's ignore rewind, pause and stop.
Let's hit play.


Friday, February 17, 2017

Show Me Who You Are

With great intention I am learning more about who I am and even more daring than that, I am beginning to show other people.

You know how Batman hides - well is he hiding the super hero or the real person?
We all are both, and I believe it takes courage to show both.

Here is ME:
I write, I sing in my car, I laugh, I dance, I love, I eat, I read and I laze. Boy, do I enjoy a good lazing session! I love walking slowly, I love snuggling, flying on planes, people watching and feeling the sun.
I also cry, I get scared, lonely, fearful, sad. Struggle with feelings of not being enough. Being too round, not clever enough and what on earth will happen in the future? What if I do not receive an email, what if I do? My goodness sometimes my inner critical thinking can shout louder than thunder can roar.

Who are YOU?

We consist of good, pleasant, fun, dark, moody, gloomy and very bright energies.
We are all of these things. So, show up for all of these things.
Be present and be there as your very best friend for yourself.
Know your tribe, find them. These are your cheerleaders, your friends who truly are family, your family who truly are your friends. The ones you see by your side - and there aren't many - so keep showing up for them. Keep showing up for yourself.

A beautiful kite is not flying alone.
I want to see ALL of who you are. So do you too.

Always with love,
Jayne